PenWomanShip

She began her trek
in early dawn.
Like a prowler she tiptoed
placing you on the steps
of the drab government building
knowing someone would come.

She murmured goodbyes
her body still weak
belly distended from delivery.
Your eyes tightly shut,
face pink and wrinkled,
body swaddled, still warm
under the morning dew.

Another girl, they must have said
shaking their heads,
filing their reports.
Another girl.

You cried ferocious tears.
Across the world
I heard you,
dreamed about you.
You see, we had been waiting
a long time
just for you.

I filled my luggage
with infant diapers, sippy cups
a bunnysuit with bright yellow ducks.
and traveled so many miles
to find you
to make our family complete.

I wonder how it will be
for you and I.
We who share no blood or genes
living together under this roof.
Will we build memories
and bead them together like charms
on a bracelet?

In years to come,
will you look at the folds in your eyelids
over almond shaped eyes
that slant gracefully towards the moon
and toss your straight, ebony hair that shines like glass
so different from the undulating chestnut waves in mine
and question who you are?

Will you look back
and wonder who she was?
How for nine months
she could have fed you
through her own body
then laid you down
while your body
was still warm.

Will you return and search for her?
looking for clues in a sea of faces
in provinces so remote
using words your infant lips never formed
mastering inflections and characters
ancient and full of mystery
and search among women
who look lost because they
lost
a daughter?

There is so much time yet
to dwell not in the past
not in the future
to bake gingerbread
blow out birthday candles
and read Good Night Moon

Come little one
take my hand
we set an extra space
at the table for you
come have supper with us
while it is still warm.